Entering into a marriage is a huge commitment.
For many people, it is a lifelong commitment. Marriage is a sacred union between two people.
They are professing their love for each other and formalizing things with a ceremony. They will share this time with friends and family and they will have everyone that means a lot to them present at the wedding.
Entering into this new part of your life is often a very huge step for people.
There can be a lot of anxiety and uncertainty that goes along with the decision to get married.
However, there are some things that can help make things go smoothly and help you to make a conscious decision about whether you are ready to marry your partner or not.
By answering these five questions, you will get a clear idea of exactly what your relationship is built on and where it has the potential to go in the future.
1. Children – Yes or No,
The first thing to discuss is whether you and your partner have the same thoughts and feelings on children.
Do you both want children, Are you both planning on becoming parents at some point in the future, If there is a difference of opinion here, then you need to seriously rethink your relationship.
A difference of opinion on children can wreak havoc on a marriage later on. It is not fair to your spouse or to the children that you may have in the future; if they are not wanted.
2. Family Finances:
Your next issue is money and spending habits.
Are you and your partner able to have practical conversations regarding your finances and how money is spent, If you have a hard time talking about this prior to getting married, you are going to have a much harder time talking about it after you are married and are sharing all of the financial responsibilities.
This can doom a marriage to failure before it ever starts. Plus, the majority of all divorces are caused by financial issues.
3. Marriage Bed:
can you talk openly about sex with your partner, If you are not completely satisfied or see some things that need to be worked on, are you able to tell your partner this, Are you both open to listening and working out any issues that either of you have, If you are not able to have an open sex life with each other and talk about it, there is no way that you are ready to enter into a marriage together.
Chances are that if you are already having issues related to your sex life, they are only going to get worse over time.
4. Mother and Father In Law:
You need to know how much the in-laws are going to be in your life.
They may be the most wonderful people in the world. Perhaps they are very loving and caring.
They may have deep feelings for both you and your partner. However, they cannot run your life. They are not in control of your marriage or your relationship.
If there are no boundaries and in-laws are allowed to do as they please, you are both setting yourselves up for disaster.
5. Household Chores:
The last thing that needs to be discussed is chores.
Ask your partner if they will clean the toilet. Now, this may sound crazy, but think about it.
Do you want to be responsible for doing all of the housework, Do you think it is fair that you be solely responsible for cleaning up messes that both of you make, If your partners answer to this question is, “No or isn’t that your job,” you need to take a long hard look at whether or not you are ready to enter into a marriage with this person or not.
Also published on Medium.