One of the sad realities of life is that most of us will experience at least one very difficult and painful breakup in our lifetime.
Everyone, and every situation is different, there is no one size fits all solution, and despite what many will say there is no set time limit either, it will take as long as it takes.
But if you want a few tips on how to get over a relationship more quickly, just read on.
I know I said there was no specific time limit, and I meant it, but if you find that you’re not really living your life, you’re missing work, or you’re not spending time with your friends, etc, for more that a few months you might want to get some help.
There’s nothing wrong with still hurting or having feelings for your ex after a few months, but if the feelings are still so raw that you aren’t really living your life, you may be able to benefit from someone who can help you wade through those intense emotions.
Don’t ever feel uncomfortable asking for help if you need it. Going through a breakup hurts like crazy, and if someone can help you move through that pain a little more quickly, why wouldn’t you jump at that,
Here are a few tips that may be able to help you find the closure you need, a little more quickly, so that you can move on and find another relationship:
1. It’s OK, and even necessary, to spend a little time grieving.
A breakup is kind of like a death, you’ve just lost the companionship of someone you’ve loved and relied on.
That’s a hard thing to do. It’s important that you don’t try to pretend that you aren’t hurting.
While I’m not suggesting you run around crying all the time, you do need to acknowledge the pain you are feeling and not just try to bury it and pretend you don’t care.
If you do that the pain will not really ever go away and it will jump up and surprise you when you least expect it. You have to allow yourself time to grieve, then heal.
2. Resist the urge to contact your ex. You do have to learn to build your life without your ex in it.
I know that one statement can be unbelievably painful, but it’s true and the sooner you realize it and try to move on the sooner you will feel joy again and be ready for another relationship.
A clean break is usually the best, in the long run.
3. In a relationship two people tend to ‘meld’ into one.
A lot of tastes and interests can overlap to the point where it’s a little tough to remember where you stop and your partner starts. That’s why it’s so important to get ‘you’ back after a breakup.
Spend time doing the things you enjoyed doing before you were with your ex.
Chances are there were some activities that you didn’t do as often when you were in your relationship because your ex didn’t enjoy them. Those are the activities you need to spend time doing now.
Not only will that help take your mind off of your ex, but it will give you something fun to do that will help you forget about your ex.
When you’re trying to figure out how to get over a relationship, just remember that it will take time.
I know that sounds like a cliche, but it’s true. Just allow yourself time to grieve, and don’t put added pressure on yourself by setting a time limit. The amount it time it takes to move on will take as long as it takes.